Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
