Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
