Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
