True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
