sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize