i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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