He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
