Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize