but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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