my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i think i have herpe
just one?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
