No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
So vagazzling was a success
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
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