I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
