My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Randomize
