and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
