why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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