ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
You are a booty call, not a friend.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
