did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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