i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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