i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I believe in your delicious
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize