so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
