she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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