the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
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