shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Randomize
