The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
