"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
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