I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
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It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
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Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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