We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
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