just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
The Olympian is in my bed
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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