You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
