I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize