i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
