I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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