just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
