Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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