We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
