maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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