...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Of course I have a pirate flag
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
