I need help removing her.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
