Sry I called you an 8
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
