garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
