Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize