dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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