I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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