I seem to have left my pride at pride
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
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remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
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Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
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