So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
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She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
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I can't turn off my feet"
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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