Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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