She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
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you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
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If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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