Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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