He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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