Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
